Music

Okay so i need to admit something. I have a major problem. MAJOR. Well maybe its not a problem but its definitely an addiction. A good addiction though. itunes has become my best friend again. I am so thankful that i have someone in my life who supports my passions and "good addictions" so to say.  I have bought so many amazing albums recently.

After a good 9 months of being musically dry and uninspired in all aspects of my life, i have finally come back. Music was my everything. Finding a new artist was like winning the lottery. Writing it, singing it, playing it, listening it... ahhhh so amazing. Then this year, i have no idea what happened. Everything just felt numb. I wasn't connecting to music like I did before. It was so frustrating.

I couldn't push it though. Everyone goes through seasons where they have dry spots but it felt so wrong. Ever since i was a toddler, music was important. Why was my passion leaving me now? Well, all i can say is its back. I don't know or where it came from but it hit me hard. I have a feeling its because summer hit and i actually have time to think, process, learn (in a different way), and be inspired now.

I believe that people who are truly inspired by music don't categorize themselves to a genre. Somedays i feel like listening to alternative. The next day, pop. I have playlists that are filled with numerous genres, but it doesn't even matter. The only thing that matters is that the music i listen to is real. I love music that the artist composes themselves. I don't think i could ever sing someone else's song, thats not real to me.  Enough with the ramble, here's the albums that are going to be my addictions for this summer, more will always be added though. :)

Ellipse- Imogen Heap
Can't Be Tamed- Miley Cyrus
Albertine- Brooke Fraser
Sigh No More- Mumford and Sons
and, ALL of Angus and Julia Stone... they are amazing.

P.S. The reason i like whole albums instead of just a few songs is because with only a couple songs, you can't get a feel for the artists inspiration. I feel like i'm cheating out the artist. An artist puts all the songs in a certain order for a reason and i feel like i need to respect that.

L

simplistic new shoes

So today i got some good ol' Chuck Taylors. I had gone in and out of stages in wanting them but always opted for Vans instead. I once got some dark green converse's that were a size and a half too big for me (dad's idea "your feet are growing!") but obviously i never wore them. There such a classic shoe. I'm a pretty classic person. Why Not?

Buying a pair of classic tennis shoes is much different than buying a pair of fancy sandels (to me, that is) Sandels aren't a staple. You don't wear them everyday. They don't go on rugged adventures with you in the dirt. I don't know about you but i'm all about routine. For the most part i have the same hair and makeup all the time. My clothing style is still evolving but i'm all about the classic's. The point is, everyday tennis shoes are more important to me then accessory's.

At first, i wanted to get the white classic high-tops. Then i decided against it because A. i'm not that daring and B. i already have white vans. So instead, i got black low-tops. I Already laced them to my liking and put jelly inserts in them to make them more comfy. Pretty excited to start a new relationship with shoes i know will last me quite awhile. :)
x

Fish

So awhile back me and my boyfriend decided it would be a good idea to get fish. I am deprived from pets at my house so i was thrilled. When we got to Petsmart the worker told us that the only type of fish we could get that would be guaranteed to live would be a beta fish. That all sounded fine and dandy except that we wouldn't be able to get two of them :(

If you don't know this, beta fish will fight if two male (the pretty ones) fish are in the same tank. They'll fight until death. To me this just seems odd. But hey, their brains are pretty teeny. Anyways, the worker showed us a little tank that would hold two beta fish because it has a plastic divider down the middle. Perfect! So we proceeded in buying our fish and naming them Harmony (mine) and Thunder (carters).

Its quite funny because even though its been months, the fish still try to break through the plastic divider and fight each other. Sometimes when theres nothing to do i'll just sit by my fish and watch them try to fight. I thought that after awhile our fish would just get over it and learn to tolerate each other. I was wrong. The reason we got two in the first place if because we wanted our fish to have a friend! Again, i was wrong.

I love being alone, but i definitely could not tolerate a life full of alone-ness.

so theres my fish. a very important and time-consuming part of my life. obviously.

20 things I want to do this summer...

1. Read 10 books

2. Finish AP summer assignment

3. Take a swim in Topaz Lake

4. Sleep under the stars

5. Wear only summer dresses for a week

5. Have a BBQ

6. Go on a looooong bike ride

7. Make and bring someone cookies spontaneously

8. Get Acrylic nails

9. Swim in the ocean till i become a prune

10. Write letters to Joseph

11. Take a bath twice a week

12. Turn off my phone for a day

13. Limit my phone use all together

14. Start piano

15. Start writing music again

16. Have a picnic

17. Jump off a rock into a lake

18. Meet new people

19. Do Gods work

20. Plant a garden

<3

Connections

So last night my family, carter, and I picked up Nathan. I met him in London on a tour bus and we suddenly connected. we talked that whole day about travels, life, and Europe. The next two days we spent together and it was so good for me. But thats another story.

So anyways we picked him up last night and my and C decided that on his first night, In n Out was a must. I love spontaneous moments like that when you don't know what will happen next other than it will be good and you are content. Once we got home, Carter left and me and Nathan had wonderful conversations.

Mainly we talked about connections. I told him about when i first saw him, we made eye contact. It wasn't the weird eye contact where you suddenly turn away and blush. It was the kind where you know your supposed to meet, you were put in each others paths for a reason. There's a connection. It definitely wasn't a love connection either, just a connection.

Its crazy to think of our world being intertwined. Everyone meets everyone for a reason, lesson, or for a friend. Its like God has all these invisible strings connecting us to people we've never seen before and even people living on the other side of the world.

This blog is very random and spontaneous, but thats my heart. I cant wait for this week.

Lauren

Being Restored

Life's been getting me down recently. This whole year i've struggled with what the Lord wanted for me. I drew close, then backed far away. Nothing was ever stable and my heart hasn't been at rest. I've tried to change, and only resulted in being more frustrated. I was doing things that was preventing a relationship. it sucked. it does suck. it's not over yet but it came to a head.

I started loving poorly and the ones i loved the most seemed to be the ones hardest to love. I could never get a grip and that scared me.

I read a blog today that inspired me to take some time alone and wait for God to tell you what to do. I thought this was probably the best way to spend my Monday afternoon after feeling dejected. I put my phone in a drawer, grabbed a towel, bible and a journal and headed out to the park near my house. God was amazing to me.

The clouds didn't part. I didn't hear trumpets. I didn't hear anything actually. God showed me what he wanted through his word. First, i felt directed to write a list of everything that gave me joy. Not happiness, Joy. Then i reflected on how much i was actually doing things that gave me joy. I also reflected on things i have been doing that gave me happiness, not joy. I came up with some conclusions on how to fix that problem and then God put a random verse in my head. It was 1 Peter 5:8. At first, i was skeptical and almost didn't look it up. Then i did.

Be self-controlled and alert. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone devour. Resist him, standing firm in the faith, because you know that your brothers throughout the world are undergoing the same kind of sufferings. And the God of all grace, who called you to his eternal glory in Christ, after you have suffered a little while, him himself restore you and make you strong, firm, and steadfast. To him be the power forever and ever. Amen.

James 5:8

Welcome to my blog.

Lauren